You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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