worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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