tell your sister to shave her snatch
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
