You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Randomize
