just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize