I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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