Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
