I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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