I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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