Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
