my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
