i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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