you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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