Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize