pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
