I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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