I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
