I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I got inside last night via doggy door
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Randomize
