i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
