I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
