We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
