HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
