At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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