So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
i think im in europe. pls send help