I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
