Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
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Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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