I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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