All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize