chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Dicks are not precious.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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