K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
