corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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