Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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