Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
