Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
mondays should just be called national damage control day
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
