Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
