Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
