some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
