is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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