You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Randomize
