Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
My cat gives me a boner
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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