She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
