I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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