Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
he just fucked me for my cheese..
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
