The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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