I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
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