Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
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