Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize