We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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