So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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