ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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